Author Archives: Michael

Road trip?

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Every fall I embark on a road trip. This is not a comfort thing. I sleep in a tent, with a “self-inflating” (haha) mattress. I wake up at 2 a.m. to the sound of bears sniffing my tent. I wake up to moose farting after they decide to bed down next to my tent. A moose’s digestive system it not a pleasant think to wake to from three feet away. It sounds like muffled screaming.

Sometimes I go to California. Or the Northwoods. But most often, my target is Montana and the northwest corner of Wyoming. Places like Yellowstone National Park, Grand Teton National Park, and the Gallatin National Forest. I am drawn to this area because it is not strip malls. The ecosystem also supports grizzly bears, which no other place in the lower 48 really does. They are cantankerous beasts, disliking roads and development. In that way, we are the same.

I do not seek daily showers or pampering. I seek solitude amongst the wild beasts. When I’m in town, I’ll sample the nightlife, maybe stay with friends. But these are usually quick excursions, and it’s back to the national forest.

So why do it? The wild spaces are my church, my religion…things I can touch and see and feel. In my wake I leave unchecked strip malls and a sickly brown haze in the sky. It has to be this way.

Who knows where I’ll end up on this one. Maybe a simple national forest like the Chippewa in Minnesota. Or maybe Olympic National Park in Washington. All that matters is that it’s wild and clean. Because these last places are the actual rare jewels in 2013.

drying out clothes

A dryer.

The Fifty Greatest Albums of All Time

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…according to the music geek pictured on the right.

I haven’t really discussed my love of music here. I am obsessed with music in the same way I am with books. I still buy CD’s (I find vinyl exciting, but also a physical burden once you reach a certain number). My office is full of CD’s. My iTouch (the 64mb vesion) has 30mb free. I have close to 200gb of music on my desktop hard drives (the computer I’m typing  this post on). I participate on the fantastic website Rate Your Music, where you can see ranking charts for “All Time” and each specific year. The albums are rated by those who register with the site, where much hilarity and discussion ensues.

When I write fiction (or anything, really) I’m listening to music. I have specific iTunes playlists for novels. The opening chords to a song can put me into the mindset I need to be in, even more so than green tea or chocolate.

Please note that this list is simply what I’ve been listening to the most the past several years. It can change at any time, for a variety of reasons. However, many of the same players will be in any list I produce. A list stretching beyond fifty albums would surely have a Stooges album, a Stones album or two, and a Zeppelin album or two. The Rate Your Music ranking is for “all time” unless noted otherwise (such as “Album X was ranked #50 for 2011”). Also, you’ll find repeat artists on the list. There are three kinds of list-making realms a music nerd can fall into. The first kind is the “IYF” list (Impress Your Friends). You’ll find a lot of obscure items thrown in that the list maker probably never listens to. The second kind is the Canon List, one that mirrors Rolling Stone or some of the modern online magazines. The third kind is the Honest List. I hope that’s what this is.

Rather than bloviate about how awesome each record is, I’ll allow for only a sentence or two. After all describing music endlessly is pointless when you can just listen to it. It’s like exiting the grocery store and having a stranger ask if he can take your quarter and purchase that shiny orange gumball for you. Why do you need a guy between you and the gumball machine?

50. In Rainbows – Radiohead (#71 at RYM) 2007

A fine mix of intriguing sonics and emotional resonance. A welcome return to form.

49. Sebastopol – Jay Farrar (#703 for 2001 at RYM) Continue reading →

The polar bear that starved.

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You’ve all seen the heartbreaking photos.

A majestic polar bear, while desperately searching for seals on the Arctic island of Svalbard, collapsed to the tundra and called it a day. At that point, the polar bear looked like a rug.

I have no doubt that this story will be largely ignored. Many people will go about their day as if nothing happened. And why not? We live in a strip mall construct. Our thoughts focus on point a to point b to point c in this concrete vortex. What’s the big deal about a starving polar bear way in the middle of nowhere, with the hard Arctic wind at its back, and a few sea birds screeching about? What does this have to do with how much it costs me to fill up my car, buy groceries, or pick up my kids at soccer practice?

That’s why I’m proposing that a mock-up be made of this special polar bear. Actually, thousands of mock ups. It should be funded by the pentagon because it is a national security issue. Every day for the next year, one of these starved, mock-up polar bears should be placed in someone’s freaking driveway, so they are are forced to look at it, forced to have the emaciated bear occupy their thoughts as they figure out how to move the damn thing or get around it (at last Johnny has a use for his 4WD).

We tend not to pay attention until it hits us in the wallet or shows up in our yards. We go and buy that 10 MPG SUV when the 30 MPG sedan will do.

Today, a hungry bear died, far, far in the north.

There was nothing insignificant about it. Especially when your great grand kids ask where the glaciers went. Or where the polar bears went, or where the wolves went, or the wolverine, or the bees (and thus our crops) or who knows how many species. And at some point, somewhere down the line, a desperate, hungry generation will trudge upon this Earth much in the same way that polar bear trudged upon Svalbard Island. And they too, will collapse to their mother, evermore.